Whenever a lad hits up on me and asks me where I came from, I always tell them I came from a floating island in Gulliver's Travels. They laugh. Those little bastards don't know it's Laputa. Guess I'll have to change my address, whaddya think?

Am quite chuffed about how well I can handle a randy bloke in bed. I don't just lay there and let them do all the work, I like getting involved as well. Sloppy blowjobs that leave them panting and moaning. Snogging them until they've had enough and r...

What does a lass need to do to land a decent lad here? I've been doing my best to find a man who can satisfy my deep sexual desires for so long. Honestly, I am getting sick and tired of fooling around with guys who only care about themselves during s...

I can be the missing piece of your puzzle. All my life I've been searching for my place. I feel like a missing soul wandering around and looking for a place where she belongs. My naughty mind is too dirty for ordinary men. I am looking for a proper b...

Being a horny old lady is quite a drag because there are not a lot of lads who will let a granny fuck them. I think the world will become a better place once young studs learn the importance of making old cougars happy.

Putting vinegar on my chips is heaven. I have to admit that a put a lot on them. It has this rich flavor that compliments the salty taste of chips. Other times I put sauce on them, or a mix of vinegar and sauce, but I really prefer vinegar. You shoul...